I am happy that he's been trying to get back with me. I'm not pretty sure really if he meant what he said. I've just been trying to see his actions and tell from there. It's really hard to get exact answers from guys. They're always complicated.  But when he admitted that like a week ago. He was totally sober and sweet. Though I don't really want to fall for the trap, I almost did. Good thing I was sober too or else I could have regretted what I did. I simply asked for some time to think about stuffs and what do I really want. Part of me wants to get back with him at that instant but part of me doesn't want to. That's because I did get hurt so bad and I am scared to go with it again (if it is going to happen again...)

What the hell?! I kinda got tired of thinking about it last night. I did hit the bar with my friends to watch the Houston Astros (just to forget about stuffs and enjoy good company). They won!!! Go Astros! World Series!  I got tipsy but its good coz I won the dart game with my friend! Wehehe!! Cricket! It was fun!

Well, I saw this test at the net. Pretty interesting! Makes me think if I really get crazy when I'm drunk.... better ask my friends then....

You're A Crazy Drunk

When you drink, you get wrecked - and it ain't pretty.

Lessons Learned from a Relationship!!!

1. If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.

2. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.

3. If you have ANY doubt in your mind about a man's character, leave him alone.

4. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.

5. Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to be.

6. Don't force an attraction.

7. Slower is better.

8. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy.

9. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no you can't "be friends." A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.

10. Have faith in God regarding your relationship, but don't let faith make you stupid. God does things decent and in order.

11. Don't settle.

12. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.

13. If he keeps changing his mind about the relationship--take that as a BIG sign that he is unstable. Do you really want to be with a man like that?

14. Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.

15. Honorable men take care of their business and aren't involved in a whole lot of mess.

16. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.

17. There's only one 'reason' a man dumps you; he doesn't want you.

18. Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women.He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?

19. You really do have to find a few frogs before finding the prince.

20. Always put yourself and your happiness first.

21. Always have your own set of friends separate from his.

22. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.

23. Like from the show Sex and the City, if he doesn't call, he just isn't that interested.

24. Be honest and upfront.

25. Know when to cut the cord, don't be strung along.

26. Don't fall for the "I'm confused role". Remove yourself from the situation to let him figure things out (but don't wait for him, move on).

27. If you want to have a clue as to how he will treat you, watch how he treats the WOMEN in his family (not just mom).

28. There's more than physical abuse, there's emotional and mental abuse.If he causes any of them...flee.

29. You cannot change a man's behaviors. Change comes from within.

30. Don't let him place rules on you that he is not willing to follow himself --double-standard.

31. Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...even if he

has more education or in a better job.

32. Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.

33. Demand respect and if he can't give it, he can't have you!

34. Don't compete with other woman, but be aware that men are attracted to what they see.

35. If you think he is cheating, he probably is. Confront him right away and if you feel he's lying, let him go.

36. Actions speak louder than words.

37. Never let a man define who you are.

38. Never rely on a man for compliments, look to yourself for that.

39. Never borrow someone else's man.

40. If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.

41. Just because he says he loves you, doesn't mean that he won't hurt you and it doesn't mean that you are meant to be with him.

42. To use painful hard-won wisdom -- 'get it right' the next time.

43. Know that you deserve to be the number one person in the life of the #1 person in your life.

44. Love is a verb ...

45. Learn to give up your lifelong task of trying to make someone unavailable -available, someone ungiving-giving, and someone unloving-loving.

46. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.

47. All men are NOT dogs.

48. You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a two way street.

49. If you don't love self...you can't love anyone else.

50. You cannot mend someone else's broken heart.

51. You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute about baggage...deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship.

52. You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship consists of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not supplementary.

53. Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right

54. NEVER give more in a relationship than you are getting out of it.

55. Never become your man's "therapist".

56. When actions and words conflict, believe the actions. Respond to the actions.

57. A real healthy relationship requires two people. One person can end it, but it takes two to make it work.

58. Don't fall for the "I'm not the loving type"...when a man loves you there is nothing in this world (within reason) that he wouldn't do for you.

59. Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and you're always readily available to him he takes it for granted.

60. Give him his space...let him go out with his boys, don't pressure him to spend time with you, You cant force a man to hang out with you.

61. If you wouldn't allow your daughter to be with him you shouldn't.

62. Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.

63. Never move into his mother's house.

64. Provide financially for yourself and don't depend on anyone.

65. Never co-sign for a man.

66. Never believe you have the perfect guy and he is so innocent.

67. Never spoil your man; let him spoil you.

68. Never let a man mess up your credit.

69. When it's time to let go; let go.

70. Good men should be treated like good men.

71. Don't play games.

72. You can't make an ogre into a housewife - or husband.

73. Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you need. Keep him in your radar but get to know others.

74. Compatibility in terms of educational attainment, values, beliefs, personal and career goals, and socioeconomic status, are important.

75. Never date a guy who wears colored contacts. It's just not natural.

I really liked this... makes me think!

I've been trying my best to keep myself busy lately just to forget about what has just happened to me. I've tried to be strong for myself but it's kinda hard to resist the temptation. Everything that's going on right now is too complicated. Being friends with someone who was your significant other before is never that easy. It takes a lot of maturity to deal with the situation. I believe my friends are right. It wouldn't work coz doing that would make you hope that there's gonna be some future with it. But the truth is, you got to accept that it's the end of it. I just have to be happy that everything happened earlier. *Sigh*

These past few weeks was the worst... Well, everyone have their ups and downs... And I know that there's always light at the end of the tunnel... Needless to say, no matter how strong and firm you think you are, there's always the greatest evil that's going to stop you from being happy... But if you surpass all these, it will surely make you much stronger and make you realize what you did wrong and what's really important in your life... I wish all these heartaches will be gone much sooner...

...my sentiments...

It pains me to know that you have fallen out of love for me. I simply didn’t have the slightest idea that things have been getting worst already. All this time, you made me believe that you still feel the same way as I do. You pretended that everything’s all well. All the while I thought we were making things work out in our own style. Little to my knowledge you were slowly trying to disregard every bit of feelings you used to have for me. And there am I all optimistic, struggling, and believing in every word you say. I trusted you. I trusted you with all my heart but this is what I got all in return. You left me wholly fantasizing by myself. You left me alone in the darkness of these emotions you’ve subjected me into. I have given you all that you could have asked for and partly forgot about myself. I lived my life almost pleasing you. I made you my best friend thinking that you will be at my side to guide me. Thinking you will be that one and only person who can understand me and accept me for who I am. But I guess I have given and expected too much from you. And now, I detest to find myself astray and totally confused...

Now, despite all that has happened you're asking me to be your friend and companion. I'll be glad to accept the offer but at the same time I do not want to torture myself and continue hoping that there's going to be a wonderful conclusion to this friendship. I don't wanna find myself all assuming again. I do want to move on and be thankful for such an experience. I wanted to find myself at the point where I can just smile about everything and feel no remorse for it. I just wanted to be myself again... happy... content... complete!

Currently Reading He's Just Not That Into You: The No-Excuses Truth to Understanding Guys By Greg Behrendt, Liz Tuccillo see related

I had a good time visiting Austin a few weeks ago. I went to the state capitol of Texas which is located at Austin (the capital of Texas). I really liked the environment there. Its more like Manila. You can see a lot of people walking too, especially at the UT at Austin campus. It makes me miss PI... those were the days... when I walk on the side streets of Taft Avenue from my dorm on my way to school... it was dusty considering there's too many vehicles passing by...

This picture was taken at the back of the state capitol... right at the park...

This is the front view of the state capitol...

Then we went inside to see how the state capitol really looks... they said people just meet here once a month to discuss issues concerning the state... i wonder how this room was actually preserved considering this is but an old establishment... you can see the pictures at the back... those were pictures of those previous heads of the senate...

Kinda interesting huh?! I really like visiting places and knowing a lot about them... I'm looking forward to going to another one! can't wait actually!!!